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Pages: Answers: Yes. Yes. Yes. [1]
Author Topic: Answers: Yes. Yes. Yes.
Hsin-shi

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2011-02-08 19-03-38

Answers: Yes. Yes. Yes. My advice to you is if you are interested in sharing his fetishes with him, find a non-confrontational way to let him know you know and don't mind/approve/are interested in sharing or exploring together. If you aren't that interested in sharing his fetishes, then I would try to get over the surprise and whatever hurt you feel that he hasn't been totally open with you, and let him be himself and keep his little fetishes to himself. Almost everyone has things they will not tell anyone else, no matter how open they intend to be in their relationships. If it doesn't really hurt the relationship, let them keep their privacy.
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Jilli

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2011-02-10 17-04-00

I am a little afraid he will be upset that I found out. I'm a little worried that we are getting married but he doesnt feel comfortable sharing these things with me. I'm afraid maybe he doesnt feel totally comfortable with me or thinks I'll react badly. But I think he can be honest with me. I love him unconditionally and wouldnt love him less for it. Its kind of wierd knowing but also not being supposed to know. I'm kind of turned on by the idea of using his sexual fantasys to turn him on without him knowing that I know. Like buying a pair of converse shoes and wearing them around him. Maybe playfully putting my converse shoed feet on his lap and seeing how he reacts. I secretly want to know exactly what drives him wild so I can do it to him without him knowing its intentional. It seems very hot to me, and kind of naughty to be secretly manipulating him in a way I know he enjoys. It has nothing to do with me wanting to hurt him. I want to turn him on more than I already do. I want him to be sexually satisfied. And I want to give that to him even if he still likes to look at the porn.
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  • tuxhorn

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    2011-02-12 10-37-26

    Keep it your own kinky secret Just like you are doing now. You can tease him with the shoes without him knowing that you are aware of his fetish. That is so hot to me!
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  • fleisher

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    2011-02-13 3-00-42-

    Buy some Converse sneakers. See what happens.
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  • hedman

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    2011-02-21 17-33-53

    ohh.. maybe you could bring it up to him, it sounds like you feel more left out than offended. Find a shoe fetish site and say to your man, "come look at this", maybe you can get in that way? Somking stinks, watching it might be different but have you ever been in a room with a smoker? eweewww! Better yet, suprise him with a pair of converse, just go out and get a pair and wear them around the house with little or nothing else!?! I admit the secrecy thing kills me to, and it may be the whole "secret" that's got him by the balls. Since it sounds relatively mild you may decide to just let him have that quirk to avoid further fetish finding. I gotta refresh the page, I'm dying to hear(read) what the other fo-folks have to say about this...
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  • loew

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    2011-02-27 4-16-20-

    Do you think he is turned on by it all being a big secret for him? Do you think uncovering the secret might make it less of a turn on for him?
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    burts

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    2011-03-26 3-25-21-

    Possible, but not very likely at all People usually hide fetishes and kinks because they think they aren't "normal", they hide them out of embarrassment and self-consciousness. They don't generally hide them because the secrecy is a fetish in and of itself. I'm sure nearly everyone on this forum will tell you that *sharing* a fetish or kink with a willing partner is FAR, FAR better than only being able to enjoy it in hiding.
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    antol

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    2011-04-06 17-23-48

    You know him better than I For me, being in the kinkfo is a secret from my bf, he is in the same room as me when I'm doing it but he has no clue(so far as I know). I delete my history a dozen times a day and I take all my turn ons out on him. I don't know if it's really keeping it secret that gets me, I think I'm scared he will look at me differently but for many it's the thrill of possible discovery, like screwing outside when you think no is around but there is the risk factor. It's kind of like high stakes gambling. How long have you been engaged?
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  • eppolito

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    2011-06-13 2-18-41-

    We've been engaged about a year I think my fiance keeps a very careful image of himself to other people. I know for a fact that I know him better than anyone else, and that I know things about him nobody else does. I think maybe he likes being secretly devious and nobody expecting it. I kinda like that too in him, but I'd love it if he shared it with me. It would make me feel even closer to him and I'd love for us to be secretly devious together in a way. Especially since we both have a very similar image to our friends and families.
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  • nice

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    2011-06-30 6-30-31-

    I like your idea of being covert and just indulging his fantasies without him knowing you know, it's not like your using it against him, rather for him. That's got to be hot for a guy to just magiy have his woman start acting out his fantasy! If you tell him you found out he may well get better at hiding his activities, then your out of the loop and you dont even know it! good luck! shhhh...
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    mclouth

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    2011-08-03 1-48-44-

    I think I will do that. I am thinking of telling him that I need a new pair of shoes and asking if he wants to come along and maybe buy me a pair like he used to. I'll tell him he can even help me pick them out. I know that he won't refuse. He'll probably get really excited, like he used to (which always made me suspect he might have a foot thing). Then I'll go to a store that sells converse with him. I'll look at other shoes but then casually happen into the converse section and pick up and play around with a pair of converse. Maybe try them on and make a comment about "remember when I used to wear these a long time ago?" (I wore them when we first started dating because it was part of my style then, but haven't worn them in years). I bet he'll suggest I get them and even pay for them for me. Then, I'll wear them when I'm around him. We also used to have sex with our socks on when we first met. It was kind of a turn on to still be partially clothed. A few times he's asked me to leave some of my clothes on, but just moved it to expose my boobs and pussy. So maybe I can say "let's leave our shoes on, like old times." And I'll be wearing the converse. I wish there was a way to find out what the girls on this website did that he liked, so I could do that for him. I don't want to pay the subscription though just to find out.
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  • charleston

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    2011-09-05 14-27-27

    Can you get his porn password? If you found his subscriptions you should be able to find his password to the site (if he has a subscription) You must know him pretty well, can you guess his password? try it, good luck and I'm glad you wont let a little sneaker fetish (that appears to have plenty to do with you and your history with him) get in the way of your happiness and union... much love, joy
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  • rackliffe

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    2011-11-02 16-34-01

    He uses the same passwords for many things and I know those (he only knows I know of of them, the other I accidentally saw him type once). But I don't know his username. I tried his normal ones and they didn't work. I think he uses a different screen name so nobody knows its him. I can do some sluething to try to find out.
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  • olinda

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    2011-12-21 4-22-45-

    Now I think you got the kink does this excite you just a little??
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    Lubomyr

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    2012-02-09 7-38-05-

    It actually really does! Last night I was just really shocked. Like I had just uncovered some wierd private side of him and I didn't know what to think or do. But now I'm feeling very powerful and sexy about the fact that I know this and can secretly use it to really turn him on. He ed me a few minutes ago to say hello and I kept thinking about it while I was talking to him. I'm really excited about how he'll react. I'm personally kind of turned off by the smoking kink though and not too interested in engaging in that. If he likes to masturbate to it that's okay. I just hope its not something he wants to bring to real life. The most I'd be able to do is maybe use those bubblegum cigarettes but that seems so silly. That I'm just going to assume is a voyeristic things where he likes to watch it but not actually do it. It wouldnt make sense with him otherwise. The converse things makes a lot of sense to me though. The smoking only if I look at it as I described it earlier.
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  • woodson

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    2012-02-20 19-03-15

    Good girl! enjoy your power and your knowledge I am so glad you are open to your mans fantasy, some women can't get past their own stigmas so go to it girl, you stealth kink goddess, he's lucky to have you ((kisses))
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    weems

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    2012-03-16 6-44-16-

    two words and you'll see every keystroke ever made, be sure you want to go there before doing this and if he is real computer savvy it can be very difficult to hide such programs from him.
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    Tawauna

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    2012-03-26 14-06-48

    It happens Being a foot lover, I love the idea of the sneaker site! All kidding aside, it's not abnormal for people to have secret desires, or to have porn site subscriptions to keep them occupied. I wouldn't worry too much about that unless you start seeing shoes that aren't yours lying around. I thinkquestion you need to ask yourself, being brutally honest when you answer, is do you think your husband is satisfied with your sex life? There's no law or rule that you need to do everything your partner wants (see Mr. Ashleyx's anal spam, rather the responses to it), but you should understand those things. If your hubby is harmlessly spanking to the sites without getting sucked in to the x hour sessions, etc., I don't think there's any harm, but that's me. If it bothers you, maybe you consider talking to him about it, but beware of it turning into a huge debate over your sex life, which could be more harmful than it's worth. Maybe you pick up some new sneakers and covertly try them out around him and gauge his reaction. Remember, that's a tough topic to discuss - not all women care to know that a/their guy is into sweaty feet or some other facet of the fetish. Disclosing that can be very difficult and really put a woman off. From personal experience, I've had girlfriends get totally grossed out about it and it adversely affected our relationship. They were extreme cases and in hindsight really shallow girls, but the truth remains. No mr how you approach this, make sure you're honest with yourself.
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  • hain

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    2012-06-13 14-00-34

    Our sex life could be better It is pretty good honestly. But we just dont get to do it often enough because we have been working long opposite hours for the last x years to save for a house and our wedding. Before that we didnt live together but we only saw each other a few times a week and didn't always have sex. Sometimesor both of us wasnt in the mood. But we talked about it and understood it with eachother. Now that we live together we still dont have a ton of sex but we've discussed it as being because of the circumstances. When we do have sex it is pretty hot. I like finding new ways of turning him on and new techniques. I like when I try something knew and his face lights up and he says "oh!" I like when I do it a second time and he gets that wonderful grin that says "I love when you do that." There are some things about our sex life that could be better, but I think its more a thing of time and experimentation. We're still learning each other sexually even though we are generally very comfortable together in bed. I think the porn is occasional, for when hes home and I'm working. I have no reason to believe he'd ever cheat on me. And I'm fine with the porn. Actually I like watching porn too sometimes when he's not around. I'm into watching women recieve oral sex. It makes me really really horny (and sometimes I'll pounce him when he comes home after I've been watching it). I've kind of tried to tell him this in the past but I don't know if he really heard it. It is something I'd like to share more with him though. But I'd love it if he shared his fantasys with me more too.
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  • eisenberg

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    2012-07-08 2-37-43-

    That's good stuff If youhave great sex, then that takes some of the stress out of his trips into cybersneakers. Maybe you could try this: After you share a few glasses of wine (if you drink), ask him to share a fantasy with you that you haven't heard. Make sure the atmosphere is relaxed and that you're cool with what he might say (seriously, I have a fantasy of a woman peeing in my mouth but I've never had the balls to approach the subject). Maybe he shares it with you, maybe he doesn't (be prepared for that, too). Might be worth a shot.
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    crofoot

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    2012-07-18 16-49-10

    yep I love to see a woman wearing nothing but a raincoat and rubber boots, makes me cream in my pants.
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    cranford

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    2012-10-04 8-39-36-

    I'd try this It's important you are aware you mate has hidden desires. Best to find things that stir his imagination and fantasy and you're leading it. Fantasies are best shared with someone you completely trust and are comfortable with. Set up a very romantic evening, go overboard insetting up a sexy evening, wear something hot you believe he will like (don't start out with the sneakers, too obvious you know). Tell him while making love a fantasy you have and then ask him if he has a fantasy. That way he can share with you and feel you will be receptive.
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    ezzo

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    2012-11-16 22-06-17

    ^^good .. heed that posters advise^^
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  • Samual

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    2012-12-30 14-43-24

    smoker fetish I also am very simalar non smkr as is my girlfriend But find it very erotic for a sexy woman smoking while she teases
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    Huong

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    2013-02-02 15-30-15

    converse/keds fetish Im a guy also with a major chuck taylors converse and keds fetish, My wife knows but she isn't to compliant with the fetish.She will wear the shoes for me sometimes but when it comes to fulfilling my fantasy about them she won't have any of it. You sound like a very caring women towards his converse fetish, Thats pretty cool you should try to get involved with it with him that way he won't feel like such a weirdo, I know I do, I dont understand how I got this fetish but i do. Im love a women in a pair of chuck taylors or keds, it drives me crazy, I also am a very normal straight laced guy Im very conservative, I just have a major fetish for women in converse and keds sneakers.
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    shigeo

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    2013-03-08 13-12-58

    same here you're not alone,
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